Exposure, Sex, Rape and Sex-education - in Indian Context

Let us stop behaving hypocritically

Sorry, I refuse to be a hypocrite. I can not project myself as normal human and yet claim that I am not interested in the opposite sex. I can not ask others not to conclude the obvious even if I am in a live-in relationship. I would never ask anyone to believe in the honesty of my relationship if I prefer spending my nights with another. I can not be hypocritical in claiming that we are 'just' friends only to convey that we are not into any physical relationship but meaning thereby that so what as friends can also have a physical relationship.

I also refuse to stop advising women not to bother about their safety. I would prefer to be called as someone possessing a 'rapist's mentality' for expressing concerns for them and by asking them to take precautions if it can help saving even a single one of them. Those who are in a habit of provoking innocent women to participate in 'slut-walks' and other similar reactionary activities must be satisfying their sex-laced intents to see them walking like sluts but sorry, I will never approve this for the reason that these activities achieve little towards the real cause but serves enough to make many enjoy the show and thereby defeating the very purpose of organizing these 'shows'. I am also a male and so don't even dare to fool me by claiming that 'real men' do not feel sexually aroused at the glimpse of 'appropriately' exposed women. Even if the 'popular' Menaka-Vishwamitra episode is rejected by terming it as 'myth', the world-wide booming prostitution industry, success of 'peep shows' and 'relaxing massages' in attracting tourists to boost tourism in many countries, ever-increasing madness to attend 'rave parties' and an increasing popularity of porn sites on the internet are enough examples to expose these hypocritical claims hollow. It is patently dishonest and hypocritical to claim that an 'appropriate' exposure do not initiate 'a desire to have sex'.

Does 'exposure' invites rape?

But hey, hold on, both who think that 'exposure' invites rape and those who think that rape has nothing to do with how one carries herself need to wait and pause for a while. As 'a desire for sex' initiated by an exposure never gets automatically transformed into an 'intention to rape'. The fact is that 'a desire to have sex' is also an innocent human-reflex. However, one's background and upbringing then helps in preventing this 'desire to have sex' to get morphed onto 'forcing sex in an extreme way on other'. The reason for this transformation to occur are many including their acquired ideological understanding of a good/bad, moral/immoral and forbidden/acceptable sexual behaviors and past experiences. In many cases, statistically speaking, this transformation is also affected when the person is in a drunken state when their acquired sense of acceptable behavior, if any, through their background or the manner in which they were brought up failed to stop their natural beastly (read manly) reflexes. And come on, whom do we fool by participating in a candle march against a rape incident demanding police action to stop 'all' rapes? When in most of the cases the accused are known to the victims is it not hypocritical to still claim that it is possible for the 'police and government' to take care of them instead of them themselves.

Enough is enough

Enough is enough. Let us now at least, stop fooling women. we have fooled them enough – first by setting up a patriarchal system and now by creating a mirage-like claim that this system can be destroyed without actually showcasing a better alternative. First by forcibly trying to pull 'sari' off 'Draupadis' and now by making them shed clothes on their own in the name of 'slut walks' and 'liberation'. First by exploiting them at home only and now at all other places including home. Isn't it time now that 'women' must understand that males are males and will always remain beasts? Women are better species and they need to protect themselves and stop 'downgrading' themselves attempting to ape males. It is a crude fact that males with their beastly reflexes can find even an innocent openness in women's attitude as conducive of finding innovative ways to exploit them.

Need of sex-education with Indian perspective

Our society badly needs sex education. There is an urgent need to sensitize ourselves through an 'Indian-ized' sex education as our problems are completely different from other countries. Much before we start educating the youth on how to indulge in sex and yet avoid pregnancy we should first start with how to behave with the other sex. Sex-education weaved with spiritual/moral education is what should be prescribed for us. To start with, given our prevalent conservative attitude towards sex we can even think of providing online education on this aspect. In our country, parents would make the best teachers on sex-education if they can somehow be 'educated' to come out of their initial inhibitions in response to the need of the hour.

Conclusion

Believe me, it is 'males' who need to be reigned in while women just need to take their normal individual care. As a matter of fact, while women are family oriented by instinct males should be forced to become family-oriented. Our society further needs to be thrashed, reformed, shaken and turned upside down to make it accept rape victims only as 'victims' so that they do not face any rehabilitation problem that becomes absolutely impossible for them. On the other hand, the society must also be pushed to think of some extreme measures of tackling the accused too so that we do not have to witness another horrifying experience where the beast in males dares to attempt at 'enjoying' rapes with hapless victims. 
Instead of women asking to be treated as men, I see an immediate need to force men behave socially like women.

Can we render the Reservation Policy ‘useless’

The myth of Merit?

Many years ago, I used to find myself at a loss whenever I tried to dig a meaning out of the statement often offered by a certain set of people that 'merit' is a 'myth'. Those days this statement used to agitate me, as I always wanted to enjoy a sense of superiority that I logically associated with the marks that I used to score in the examinations. That my hard earned marks could worth less than its arithmetic value, usually drove me mad. When I would see that those who scored less than me; did not work as hard as me and were never as serious in studies as I used to be; are being preferred even after getting lesser marks, it used to push me into being engaged in extreme thoughts. I could never notice a reason worth any attention and was never able to appreciate any argument that wanted me to accept that whatever I scored in an examination was not because of the hard work only that I had painstakingly put in but the environment where I was born also had its contribution in it. I was convinced that these arguments were being manufactured by those who wanted a short cut to success and I used to feel as being cheated, being denied my due and always felt devastated at the feeling of being left out because of this ‘injustice’.

The reason in the arguments

To me, the only criteria that one could probably make some weird sense for justifying valuing a low score higher than its numeric worth was the factor attributing to 'the different financial background of the candidates'. This belief also stemmed from all the arguments that often people offer in support of the caste-based reservation system. All the arguments used to assume that the candidates associated with lower castes were necessarily of lower financial status too, despite several examples that existed before us in its contradiction. It was only when I encountered a pro-reservationist's remark that the 'policy of reservation' is not a 'poverty alleviation program' that made me analyze the issue from other aspects. By that time probably the maturity I had earned through my experiences made me ask myself what actually did that 'foolish' looking statement mean? I must admit that being brought up in a family influenced by RSS ideology I could never imbibe any attitude of hate towards others on the basis of caste. On some occasions, despite having knowledge about the caste of others I was unable to discriminate against them since I was taught to respect our elders and to extend love to youngsters irrespective of their origin. I feel it took some time for me to understand the thought behind the policy of reservation only because of my RSS influence that made me refuse to make use of anyone's origin to build up an impression about him/her. It is true that I believe that it was only the reservation policy that served the purpose for me to develop a 'caste vision' in my thoughts in order to understand the perspective behind the implementation of the reservation policy. In this limited sense the policy did attempt to serve the opposite of what it claims to aim for.

Worth of the Merit-lists

However now I am convinced that merit is indeed a semi-myth and it has a very weak correlation with someone’s performance in a career. With time and experience I have now witnessed that if given an opportunity many of us posses the ability to rise to an occasion. I have been teaching undergraduate students for more than two decades and I have noticed even those of my students making ultimately big in their life who were not as bright if they were measured only through their marks earned by them in their exams. I have seen an IAS who was 50 places below in the final 'merit list' doing a better job; an MBBS who was ranked 200 below finally excelling more; a teacher initially shaky becoming more popular teacher than those who showed initial confidence. Reason behind these facts is that the person possessed adequate urge to excel in the career. In view of the above it is clear that denial of opportunity to someone in our country has to do more with the lack of availability of the opportunities rather than the merit reflected by the marks scored in the examination conducted to select some among many of the interested candidates. The method adopted by us to select required number of candidates only reflects our collective helplessness in finding a process better than following a mechanically way of rejecting candidates using a merit list that is often prepared after an examination. These examinations are often conducted to judge a mixture of the memorizing power and understanding capabilities of the applying candidates. This process of examining candidates (excluding interaction with candidates) is generally completed in our country without revealing their identity. This is just to insulate the assessment from any possible influences and prejudices. It is only for this reason that when some candidates figuring lower in the merit list are preferred on the basis of their caste-identity, others rightly feel as cheated. Having said this however, to conclude that those who got the opportunity because of their caste can never prove themselves as better than those who were placed higher in the merit list will be yet another and a bigger blunder. It is so because who would prove their ultimate worth gets decided finally only by the urge within them to excel and has to do very little with their rank scored by them at the time of their selection. At the same time to ignore the hurt feelings of those who think that their hard work was being unjustifiably devalued for no fault of theirs would also be a mistake.

  

The vision

The only way to handle this scenario is to look for ways to expand the avenues and opportunities to include all. It seems to me that India has been ignoring an important aspect of this issue while looking to implement this policy. The policy unintentionally aims at maintaining the 'hierarchy' of the opportunities and careers and merely provides a way to replace beneficiaries of the system. Undeniably the 'reservation policy' is addressing one aspect of the problem of our society but don’t we need to ponder as to why the youth of India looks to get absorbed only in a countable few selected careers? Is it not because we ‘rate’, ‘respect’, are ‘ready to associate a handsome pay’ and accept the 'undue administrative power attached with careers that are primarily meant to serve people' only for some careers and have kept on ignoring several other avenues resulting in inspiring students to run after only those select few careers. As long as we as a country would keep on running after becoming Engineers, Doctors, IAS, Government services and for grabbing jobs in PSU, we would be trapped in the policy of reservation that merely achieves ‘replacement’ as against 'inclusion'. ‘Reservation policy’ is poised to create a fresh caste definition that would be basically classified by those who could get into these careers and those who were left out in the process. If India is looking for a satisfied youth generation then it needs to develop career options in many skills that are hitherto considered as untouchable and are disrespected probably because of the financial returns that those career can provide and more than that the social stigma that automatically gets associated with those careers. There lies a huge scope of improving the lifestyle quotient and social-acceptability factor that are usually attached with many careers that require great skills but are invariably considered worthless: such as career in different kinds of farming, career in manufacturing and productions, career in waste-management, career in cleaning and managing household activities, jobs in construction and labour oriented careers, career in repair oriented careers, career in small scale industries, career in designing and production of leather-product (shoes, bags and files), jobs as hair-stylists, career in jewellery designing, career in marketing and career in food products etc.

The challenge before us is to work towards making these careers financially attractive and socially at par with those that are being sought after by the youth today. We must simultaneously work towards balancing out the undue 'administrative power' that we improperly associate with the careers meant for serving people. Let us come out of the colonial mentality of accepting bureaucrats as our kings. It would be then that we will be able to inspire youth towards other career opportunities of comparable worth in areas such as mentioned above so that people will begin to take up careers not merely by the financial security or the administrative power that those careers can offer them but by the inherent interest and urge that they posses to make them excel in those careers.

Instead of myopically fighting for larger and fresh shares in the fixed or limited career options using the reservation policy on one ground or the other, we must work with an idea to expand the choice of careers so that we can render the reservation policy itself as useless.

Let the opportunities outnumber the takers.

A Case of Misplaced Autonomy

After the setback of the collective failure of teachers' movement in stopping the semesterisation process, some of us chose to become wiser and accepted the existence of a mutated definition of autonomy and freedom. The apparent freedom and an enviable royal power that the university authorities blatantly exhibited before the teaching community had by then left an everlasting impression on some minds that chose to welcome a twisted sense of autonomy. These people seem to have convinced themselves that the only set of people who can enjoy any kind of autonomy are the university authorities. They preferred to get associated with the University authorities and in the process willingly handed over the responsibility of carrying the flame lighted by 'Rathi' to the other sensible breakaway group. Any trace of doubt in their mind was entirely wiped out when Dr. Bhim Sen Singh, the Principal of Kirori Mal college was shown the door for his dare to impress the university with the autonomy of colleges and the academic freedom of individual teachers through the College Staff Council. A perfect stage was built up to blow another hammer on the real stakeholders of the University to implement FYUP after an illegal salary-cut order was forcibly implemented and an environment was created wherein a simple letter by a hitherto unnoticed post of Registrar could make University Professor shiver, could turn College Principals into mechanical implementer shunning all their urge to behave as advisers and transform other lesser mortals into entities that only waited to obey orders to please the University authorities.

Recent letters from UGC has only helped in showing these University authorities their true place. Suddenly the terror that was being continuously experienced by the teachers shifted on to new targets in the university system. The scare of getting the taste of their own medicine is staring in their faces when conspiratorial denial of retirement benefits by them to a retired teacher on a flimsy ground of misappropriation of funds seems to have been threatening them to choke their own necks. The system has only shifted the target from Bhim Singh/Rajesh Mohan to Dinesh Singh and his team members with UGC replacing the University authorities in the new scenario.

I pity those who are still in their deep sleep and are continuing with their misplaced understanding of the terms such as University autonomy and freedom. They have become so used to the blatant misuse of these terms to crush the popular concerns of teachers and students that they have gone blind and are refusing to see writing on the walls of the university. I wish they come up with some sense in their future pamphlets.